Putting Stuff in 914: GFL Edition

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

7 minutes ago, Unoriginal Umbrella said:

Output: A dildo that tastes like and gives the nutrients of a three-course meal. 

"Probably could solve world hunger, if it weren't a dildo."- Dr. J 

input: A copy of the Resident evil games from 1 to 7. A document containing all known things about the foundation. Very Fine.

 

Output: A copy of a game called SCP Containment Breach

 

Input: a mannequin, a horse, and a virgin. 1:1

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: A mannequin that has the head of a horse and the body of women. 

"What even is the purpose of doing this." Dr. J 

Input: One General Grievous action figure. Dr. G. Very Fine.

note: Dr. G is obsessed with the fictional character grievous and wants to "be him". Dr, G's request has been denied several times but after successfully containing 10 SCP's (3 of which are Keter). Dr. G was permitted to be allowed to use SCP-914.

 

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: A life size version of the grievous action figure, sows full signs of intelligence and is extremely aggressive.

I knew we shouldn't have done this. -Dr. D

 

Input: Donald Trump, Kim Kardashian. Very fine

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: an agender human that has the face of Donald Trump but the body and ass of Kim Kardashian. 

"I have the perfect use for them, heh heh heh."- Dr. L 

Input: Copy of SCP containment breach. Copies of the resident evil games from 1 to 6. very fine

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: GFL Breach, but every player is an admin.

This was a terrible idea. -Dr. D

 

Input: The sex tape of Dr. L and Trump/Kardashian, a virgin. Rough.

Where are we even getting these virgins? -Dr. P

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: A destroyed tape that, when physical contact is made, causes immediate death. Sent to the incinerator immediately. The mutilated body of the virgin.

"At least we did something right in destroying that tape. Don't know why we used a virgin though." -Dr. J 

Input: A replica of the Infinity Gauntlet. Very Fine.

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: A real infinity gauntlet that can really destroy half the universe. Dr. T tried to be funny and put it on the snout of SCP-682, but has since been expelled from the foundation. The gauntlet is now contained in a vault in Site-REDACTED.

Honestly, it was pretty funny seeing a grown man try and put a big glove on an alligator's snout, even if it could have ended the universe. -Dr. P

 

 

Input: A neo-Nazi, a virgin. Very fine.

[annoying furry 6,300 / 63,950]

Output: Adolf Hitler, holding a copy of Mein Kampf (My Struggle)

 

Input: A pair of SCP-178, SCP-458, a box of condoms, and hours of adult entertainment.

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: 2 replicas of SCP-173 that is completely covered in Pizza stains. It now has a very large penis with a condom on it. It's left "hand" seems to be stroking its penis nonstop. Its face is now constantly playing pornos of different genres. 

"Like I said before, why did the O5 Council even allowed this?"- Dr. J 

"this thing is going in my office."- Dr. L

Input: One copy of every Half-Life game. Very fine.

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: A copy of Half-Life 3.

We must keep this one a secret! -Dr. D

 

Input: A snow globe, a map. 1:1

Edited May 31, 2018 by mario_the_man

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: A map that now has the original location of SCP-2412-J. All lands on the map now have been painted white. 

Input: 1 sample of SCP-106's liquid, a document of SCP-3001. Very Fine.

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: A class 3 broken entry wormhole that sucks in the surrounding staff.

This was a horrible idea... AHHHHH -Dr. D

 

Input: A baby, a virgin. Fine

[Winter 1,707 / 25,777]

Output: An adult male claiming to be Jesus Christ. Further research pending.

”I don’t know if he’s who he says he is but we can do some experiments alongside SCP-343. This will be interesting.” - Dr. W

 

Input: One (1) specimen of SCP-500-1, One (1) gallon of distilled water, a cinderblock. Coarse.

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: A gallon of water infused with SCP-500. It's been tested to have homeopathic capabilities, and is now used to sustain the amount of pills in SCP-500. The liquid is now known as SCP-500-A. The cinderblock was not changed, although investigations as to if the cinderblock has any anomalous properties are planned for next week.

Can I use it now to cure my hangover? -Dr. P

 

Input: A screwdriver, a copy of the original Sonic. 1:1

[Winter 1,707 / 25,777]

Output: A power drill that plays “Gotta go fast” when operated. The song’s audio source is unknown but the drill otherwise shows no anomalous properties.

”GOTTA GO FAST!” - Dr. W

 

Input: A teapot filled with hot water, one (1) copy of 1984, and @Shuruia. Very Fine.

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: 1984 that is covered in boiling hot water. @Shuruia is now the star of the book (if that's what you're referring to.) 

 

Input: 1 scp 500-1, very fine.

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: A pill that, when consumed, instantly kills whoever consumed it. Tests are being made on SCP-682 and other keter-class SCPs that have a high threat level.

Can I use it on my ex-wife? Dr. J

 

Input: @Violator's penis, a virgin. Rough

Seriously, where are we getting these virgins? And why does the O5 council even allow it? -Dr. P

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: A mutilated corpse of a virgin with a mutilated penis attached to the virgin, presumably @Violator's. 

 

Input: The knight from the beginning, A replica of Excalibur. Very Fine

[Random Noise 375 / 10,926]

Output: A strong warrior who is out to save the princess, wielding the legendary Excalibur. He is now known as SCP-3584, and further testing will take place.

 

Input: A canister of beans, a can of soda, and a taco. Very fine

[Unoriginal Umbrella 18 / 1,981]

Output: A soda that has the combined taste of tacos and beans. 

 

Input: Breach. Very Fine.