This is a long overdue apology

[Haydenkun 11 / 1,640]

Hello. I am Hayden. Some of you may recognize me as a player on many of the G-Mod and some cs servers back in the day. I haven't been on in quite some time, and  I felt it fair to make this, open letter of sorts, apologizing for what happened some time ago. You see, when I joined the team, I was very excited at the prospect of expanding my Photoshop, GFX Design and other abilities, however, when I finally did join, and begin work on my first project, something happened, something unexpected, and kinda  terrifying. My power-supply exploded, not even a few feet from myself, with a sightline so clear I could see it myself.

 

In a shot of mostly blue and white light, my computer went from fully functional and high end to out of service, almost permanently, not to mention damaging the outlet it was plugged into, and starting a small fire, which I had to promptly put out using a wet blanket. My departing came with very little word to staff or others in the community and was later, too ashamed to return and explain myself. The truth is when my PSU combusted, it also destroyed my graphics card, and my CPU leaving me several thousand dollars in the hole on my pc. It took approximately 4 months, but I, eventually, had it running again, with a new fx 8320, 1050ti and ARC 750, plus some help from my brother, I had everything I needed to get back to work. There was just one hitch. When I realized my pc was running again, I didn't want to come back and explain myself because I felt ashamed that I left so soon after joining, I committed to joining the team and working hard to help improve myself and make the server and community network better, and in leaving without explanation, I'm certain I failed. in failing though, I'm glad to see the success you have all had in the past year, and seeing the network grow more, in recent days I finally worked up the courage to write this and try to explain my failure to you. I am sorry I couldn't simply come back because of some stupid sense of guilt and I should have produced a better explanation at the time, especially after my computer was functional again.  In the past months many changes have come into my life, this included taking on a second language, having to fight my local school system to allow me to graduate secondary school, fighting them again when I was refused awards that were owed me, and of course, preparing to live on my own in a whole new city, which by contrast, really made me feel really quite silly about not wanting to come back and explain myself, even if it was just a typed message on the board somewhere.

 

So in short....I'm sorry I didn't come back, I am sorry I couldn't explain myself and I'm sorry I waited so long to return you guys deserved better. I wish everyone the best,     

 

     `                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        ~sincerely Hayden

[Roy 10,832 / 0]

I and I'm sure others appreciate the apology. This post shows how much you care about the work you do and your commitment (which is a very great thing). Though, I do think you're beating yourself up a bit too much over this (which isn't necessarily a bad thing in my opinion). Shit happens and people become busy with life/issues that leads to inactivity. In your case, your computer exploded. It happens.

 

I hope everything goes well for you in the future! Also, do you plan on sticking around?

 

P.S. I'm sorry for not writing more, I'm working at the moment and can't write much. I may edit this post after work.

 

Thanks!

[rapperdan 2,323 / 0]

1 minute ago, Roy said:

I and I'm sure others appreciate the apology. This post shows how much you care about the work you do and your commitment (which is a very great thing). Though, I do think you're beating yourself up a bit too much over this (which isn't necessarily a bad thing in my opinion). Shit happens and people become busy with life/issues that leads to inactivity. In your case, your computer exploded.

 

I hope everything goes well for you in the future! Also, do you plan on sticking around?

 

Thanks!

 

 

was this topic made by your alt @Roy? because this man is giving us something we don't deserve an apology a full written letter of saying it was pretty much his fault the only person ik who beats themselfs up this much is @Roy anyways @Haydenkun sweat it bro shit happens that we can't control and you don't need to tell us sorry infact I would be more inclined to being angry at those who lacked the ability to understand.

[RivalRevival 986 / 13,674]

Have you tried turning it off and back on again?

[Haydenkun 11 / 1,640]

A couple things, firstly, I crapped myself laughing at wigglesworths post. 

 

Secondly is this.  While I'd like to say I'm coming back, or that I could, at least, I am just not sure that its possible, I wish you all the very best, and I hope to join you on the servers again in the future, but I'm afraid its unlikely I will be able to continue as I had hoped when I posted my application all those months ago.

 

Maybe once I have settled into my university life, and my life alone, I will re-apply, or seek to join in some other way, but for now, I'm afraid, I can't come back proper not without compromising my ability to commit the time I'd like to whatever I was doing.

[Joshy 4,364 / 44,927]

Way to go with the university stuff.  What are you studying?

 

Don't worry about these guys too much.  You owe them nothing, and this place is not worth any commitment.